i’m shooting for notoriety here…so i am trying to “ping”myself by using technorati…or any other words that attempt to make me sound more compy suave than i pretend to be…
i don’t even know if i will like it…it’s worth a shot…
here goes nothing…
Archive for October, 2007
28
Oct
getting all technical
28
Oct
lofty dreams
i received an interesting email today from an woman named adele, from liquid words productions. their company specializes in marketing and publishing manuscripts, among other things, and are working on an anthology about feminism in the 21st century. guess who they want to submit a piece from a feminist single mother perspective? ME! i am so flattered! the woman saw my comments on feministing, and followed it to random babble, and emailed me to ask me to submit! they are working on a deal to publish it in march 2008, during women’s history month.at first i was a little suspicious, as i would be w/ anything that comes to me online. i contacted a fellow feminist blogger whom i respect from the curvature, who is working on a submission as well. she also contacted me via an email address she could only have gotten from my blog, so she did her homework.i don’t have to pay any money to submit, and if it is published i may receive a small payment, but that isn’t the point at all, is it?due to some personal things in my life right now i asked to be allowed a little extra time, since the deadline is in two days, and i don’t feel that would give me enough time to do my best work. if the company agrees, then i will let you all know how the project is coming along. i don’t think i need to tell many of you how this is kind of a dream of mine, to be taken seriously as a feminist and a blogger. i also don’t need to elaborate on how i feel out of my league, since most of the other contributors are english majors w/ degrees and some type of credential, and this would be my first serious piece. ooh! nervous all over!the only other thing i am having trouble w/ is a topic. she told me a piece from the perspective of a feminist single mother. that is pretty broad.
28
Oct
seriously?
CNN did a piece on my “other boyfriend” today, and the reaction of the edwards’ campaign to it.
as if the article didn’t make me wanna shout “WTF?”, some of the comments by some no sense of humor having ass hats sure did.
don’t worry, stephen, you have my support.
via shakesville
so w/ all this argument and debate over whether halloween is slutty or for teh littlest babies, and not forgetting to squish your boobs, i forgot something that has been going on for two decades this october.
october is also violence against women awareness month.
and i totally forgot.
and that makes me a little more than ashamed of myself, especially given my upbringing.
see, native american women, especially those living on reservations, are almost twice as likely to be abused than any other race or ethnicity.
and a staggering number go unreported and unpunished.
i was glad to see that the office on violence against women have a whole branch devoted to tribal affairs.
it’s a start.
part of the painful truth is that noone seemed for a long time sure who was supposed to take care of this problem. reservations are sovereign nations, over 500 of them nationally recognized, w/ their own governments and law enforcement and language. fine when the victims and assailants are both native…unless of course the local police don’t feel like following up on a report, or they use their cell phones to call, and the abuser answers, stating everything is ok.
and then, if the assailant isn’t native? or the victim? whose jurisdiction is this? tribal laws don’t cover non tribal persons. but, local, non tribal authorities have no jurisdiction over tribal land…so if the dispute happens on a res, who is responsible?
usually, noone steps in.
there are steps being taken to fix this. in 2004 a bill was presented to give tribal authorities jurisdiction over non indian attackers on tribal land. full faith and credit, you see. but then there was the little issue of indian tribes setting up statutes to extend full faith and credit to foreign protection orders.
all any of this means is that w/ all the hype over anything else that happens in october, something this huge should not be overlooked. shame on me for forgetting.
27
Oct
girl crush
i watch tv! not as much as i used to, since i don’t subscribe to my own cable anymore…so i catch up w/ what i think is reasonable on the network sites, and i bought the itunes pass for the one i can’t miss ever…and if you don’t ever watch television, then you can’t fully appreciate the totally girl crush i have on kate walsh, who spent two seasons on grey’s anatomy b/f spinning off into her own show, private practice both where she plays ob/gyn and neonatal surgeon, addison montgomery. part of what i love about her character is the way she speaks out no nonsense about safe sex, female reproductive health, sexuality, and most recently, about the importance of talking to our kids about sex, before they find out stuff for themselves. this week she encouraged her best friend to do just that w/ her 13 year-old daughter. the girl’s parents at the end decided that they should. addison’s reasoning was to “talk to her about sex, so she can stay a little girl longer”. how true.
i think that if we are open about sex w/ our children that they will be less likely to seek out answers elsewhere. if we talk straight up w/ them, we satisfy their curiosity. we have the ability to tell them the truth, the dangers, and yes, the pleasures, of sex in a mature, safe, and committed situation. we can help them understand that sex isn’t something dirty that they have to sneak around about. they need to know that sex is an important, life changing thing, and that in the right context, a really great thing. we don’t know where or what they will learn about sex in school, from friends, from television or otherwise, but if we are open we can be certain that we will be able to keep the facts straight from the myths and distorted truth.
and if that wasn’t enough of a reason to crush on her madly…we always have her appearance on the showbiz show, which i have conveniently included for you here!
if you voted against SCHIP…fuck you.
now…read this incredible post.
i can’t even do it justice to give you a summary. you just have to read it yourself.
now, tell me one thing…
why CAN’T we have universal health care?
i haven’t seen a good reason yet.
23
Oct
rotten pumpkins
i don’t usually do this…normally, how people choose to raise their kids is really none of my concern…in fact i am all for people’s choices and freedom to make them…
as long as they aren’t hurting anyone else.
but we had an experience on a field trip w/ the Kid’s school today…
we live in hawai’i. i think you all know that by now. it’s hot here. while i, and the three girls assigned to me including my five year-old daughter, were toting pumpkins back from the field, a considerable hike, it was blazing hot under a cloudless sky. the kids had missed nap time, they were late having lunch, and thirsty. plus, they were allowed any pumpkin they wanted as long as they were willing to carry it themselves. these were not the happiest children i have ever been charged w/. my daughter was unusually whiney (or so i thought so), but so were the other girls. when she started crying that her pumpkin was too heavy, one of the other little girls said to me, “my mommy says [my kid] is a crybaby”.
what. the. fuck.
now, i try not to judge people.
and sometimes, when i am talking in private to my boyfriend, i may mention that some of the girls that my girl plays w/ are not the nicest…i may even have used bratty or something…but i NEVER bad mouth a kid in front of my own kid. adults are too harsh for kids to always understand. if my daughter complains that kids aren’t nice, or that they did something she didn’t like, i try to explain that kids aren’t always nice, and that she should try to keep being as nice as she can be. kind of a kill ‘em w/ kindness deal. i do not belittle the other children to my own. it isn’t my right. i also am always nice to that kid when i see them. i treat all the kids fairly. i don’t know what that kid is going through. while i could, off the top of my aching head, list about five quick things about MY child’s life that, IMHO, would entitle her to be a little whiney, i am not going to do that here. instead, i will tell you that for five years old, my kid has dealt w/, and still deals w/ a lot of shit. things that most adults don’t need to tolerate. she handles it all w/ a maturity that is far beyond her years. i will also say, and leave it at this…any kid that cares more if her mommy is feeling good enough to go on a field trip b/c she has had to hold mommy’s hand through a lot of pain that a chronic illness causes than if her hair is cute or not, is in my book allowed to cry once in a while.
i dare a parent to say to my face that my kid is a crybaby. i don’t hold it against that little girl. kids repeat what they hear b/c they often don’t know any better. they know that mommy or daddy said it, so it must be true. but that parent needs a lesson in sensitivity. my point, as if i need one, is that we as parents have a responsibility to our children to teach them how to treat other people. we need to teach a tolerance, b/c all to often we don’t know what other people are going through in their lives.
above all, we need to teach them that it isn’t ok to hurt other people…
even if their mommies do it.
i miss fall…don’t get me wrong…i love this island…it surely beats shoveling snow in the middle of october…brrr! but i miss the changing leaves, the smell of burning leaves and bonfires, jumping in leaf piles, apple picking, hayrides, mulled cider and the whole nine yards…
but i still get all geeked up about halloween. the kid in me loves costumes and candy and the decorations…sewing my kid a costume…cooking a big harvest meal for my “family”…it is all so much fun and it really gives me so much joy…
the pagan in me gets mixed feelings about this time of year. i LOVE halloween…it’s my favorite holiday…and someday i would love to spend it in a celtic country…to really experience it the old religion way…
but it isn’t an easy time…wiccans are faced w/ images of green faced hags on brooms cackling and scaring children, or baking them into snacks. pagans are associated w/ the gory images of slasher movies on tv or w/ drinking goats blood in the moonlight naked or some nonesense like that. it is really hard to get past the stigma this time of year, and sometimes it makes me want to board the windows on my gingerbread house (i couldn’t resist!). so much focus is on the gothic or scary or gory that many people fail to see what is really going on here. they see the blood and guts and broken eggs on houses, and i understand why they may be mistaken about halloween. my more judgement casting friends are harsh…they call this an evil time of year, even to my face when they know in fact that i feel this day is holy. they hide in their houses, away from the “evil doers” and the “satan worshiping”. many of them still believe that this is some kind of devil worship night…i just don’t get it. many of them don’t even let their kids take part in the fun parts like dressing up, and yet they don’t even try to see past the myths and try to see the history. (yes…i know the history of trick-or-treating too…and about costumes, i just choose to focus on the fun we have w/ it now) try as i might, i can’t get them to understand how sacred this day is to me and mine. i can’t get them to see the beauty and the purpose…some have even told their children that it’s “something miss brandann thinks she has to do” and such. i wonder if they even know how offensive they are being? i just want a little religious tolerance.
perhaps i ask too much…
not only do halloween and wicca and paganism have nothing to do w/ satan, but satan is a christian concept. (even satanism isn’t really about satan…just try reading up on it sometime) i know that the imagery comes from a pagan god, but that is just another example of how narrow minded and uniformed a lot of people can be. to call me a satan worshipper or to say i am controlled by the devil in actions is more than offensive…it is ignorant. let’s be clear…I DON’T BELIEVE IN SATAN!!! my actions are my own and not the work of some omnipotent being or some dark evil being bent on revenge for exile…good or bad i am the master of my own soul…
halloween is a celebration. yes, there is a lot of emphasis on the dead…but i am talking about our ANCESTRAL dead…you know, our loved ones who have gone before us! we use this time of to honor them. we set dinner tables w/ extra places to make offerings to them. we invite them to dine w/ us again.
halloween is the end of the year for pagans, and it is also the beginning…the same way that most people observe the end of the calendar year as the new year, we see this eve in the same manner. it is part of a circle of birth, life, death, and rebirth. the god prepares to leave this world, and the world goes into mourning at his passing. b/c he crosses into the netherworld or afterlife or what have you, the gates are open wide, and the veil b/t that world and ours is pulled away for a moment. those who care to listen can hear and those who are open to it can feel. night takes over day, and the darkness lasts longer. this is also a resting time when the trees wither and shed leaves to save energy for the long sleep ahead…the earth rests and makes ready for spring, and the god’s return, when the goddess mother gives birth to him, and life begins anew!
i am not asking anyone to believe what i do, or to convert. i won’t be coming to your door w/ pamphlets. i will be taking my daughter trick-or- treating, cuz it’s a darn good time. i will make an offering to those who have passed…i will say a prayer of thanx for all that has blessed this past year for me…i will carve pumpkins w/ my daughter and we will eat apples cut in half to reveal the stars, and i will most likely spend some time in reflection. i will make a meal to share w/ my loved ones. i just want to do this w/o being seen as some sort of freak. i want to show my daughter what tolerance is, but it’s hard when she sees images of what we are trained from childhood that a witch or pagan is supposed to be. no wonder kids laugh when she tells them that she thinks she is a witch. (luckily, she has an awesome teacher this year who can explain these things to other kids…boy i can’t wait for the santa story to come up…yes…i catch a lot of shit for not lying to my kid…go figure)
anyone who doesn’t know me, and is just reading this in passing, i hope that you will take from this a thought…that b/f you judge someone that you know…b/f you call this a “fake holiday” or berate someone for calling it a holiday…b/f you teach your children that halloween is just an evil night to be feared…that you might try to read up on it…try to look into the history…look into the culture…and try to learn the beautiful things about this time of year that is special to some of us…
*blessings*
19
Oct
fairy tale edition
one of my friends sent this to me today…and i liked it so much that i had to share…enjoy!
Once upon a time
in a land far away,
a beautiful, independent,
self-assured princess
happened upon a frog as she sat
contemplating ecological issues
on the shores of an unpolluted pond
in a verdant meadow near her castle.
The frog hopped into the princess’ lap
and said: ” Elegant Lady,
I was once a handsome prince,
until an evil witch cast a spell upon me.
One kiss from you, however,
and I will turn back
into the dapper, young prince that I am
and then, my sweet, we can marry
and set up housekeeping in your castle
with my mother,
where you can prepare my meals,
clean my clothes, bear my children,
and forever feel
grateful and happy doing so. “
That night,
as the princess dined sumptuously
on lightly sautéed frog legs
seasoned in a white wine
and onion cream sauce,
she chuckled and thought to herself:
I don’t think so.
17
Oct
wisdom in weird places
ahhh…george carlin…all too often in my scary, freaky life he is the voice of reason…
and he sure has a way w/ words..
Ouyang Dan
The Guy
random babbling from readerland