random babble…

Me (to Some Guy):  May I help you?

Some Guy:  Oh I don’t want to buy nothin’, but you need to call Security.

Me: Why?

SG:  There is some woman outside breastfeeding!

Me:  Well, sir, there is no need for Security she is allowed to do that.

SG:  NO!  She’s not!  She can not do that!  It’s indecent!  Where’s your manager.  (at this point he is yelling)

Me:  I am sorry sir, but it is her right to feed her child.  And, I am the manager.

SG:  She can’t do that out there!  I am calling HPD!

Me:  It is your right to do that, but she is still allowed to be there.  She could even come in here and do it if she wanted.  Have a nice day.

Being that HPD never even showed up, I am guessing either he gave up, they told him that they had better things to do, or by the time he went back outside the kid was finished w/ lunch.

The only reason that breast feeding is indecent is b/c douche bags like this guy make it into some kind of sexual thing instead of the perfectly natural and beautiful thing that it is.  It is not his right to make a sex scene out of a child enjoying lunch outside on a beautiful sunny day.  The problem w/ breast feeding is that of society’s and how we view women and all their parts, not the problem of the woman who is taking good care of her child.  Breasts are not just some sex toy or fun bag for amusement behind closed doors and women are not merely for ogling and objectification.  It’s only sexual b/c he made it that way.

in my head is the concept of what it means to be “sex positive”.

I think a few people reading this blog know where I am coming from here.  I have heard some very harsh and sharp criticisms w/in the feminist community lately WRT sex, hetero sex, being sex positive, being a radical feminist, supporting sex work and sex workers’ rights, and a whole slew of other things that are down right frustrating to read and think about.

Othering women is not conducive to what we as feminists or womanists are trying to accomplish.  I think that the issue of being “sex positive” or not is one of those key discussions that is in fact doing more damage than it is doing good.

If the goal of feminism is to maintain a woman’s right to choose for herself what is right for her life w/ the understanding that she is equal to men who already seem allowed to make those decisions, then this othering of women based on their perceived view of feminism and sexuality is counter productive. Read more »

Special thanks to the technical savvy of The Guy!

Last week I posted the totally blubworthy clip from Buffy where they magically awaken all Potentials.  

One of the things I appreciate about the work that is done in the Whedonverse is that they often focus on the consequences of actions and decisions.  I really think that it is important to understand that sometimes something that seems like the ideal solution can often have consequences that we fail to count on, sort of a ripple effect, if you will (for those of you actually reading these links, I LOVE The 4400 and get really into that ripple effect).

After making the series finale of Buffy, the writers wanted to explore the idea of awakening all Potentials…what that meant.  What would happen if someone who was in line to possibly become a Slayer was never meant to receive that power and suddenly woke up one day w/that power?

And what if she couldn’t handle it?

What if events in her life had destroyed her, or Damaged her?

Here, in this clip from Season Five, Episode 11 (Damage) of Angel, we meet Dana. Dana was never meant to actually receive the powers that she was in line to possibly inherit, but b/c of the decision made by Buffy and Willow (which had very good intentions and also very good outcome for that situation) she did.

While this clip can be triggering and has a gruesome end I want to focus on what is trying to come across here.  We are not talking about a woman not able to handle her power.  We are not glorifying a tragically mentally disturbed young woman.  We are exploring that even though we make decisions that are meant to do good, meant to have a positive outcome (in this case, save the world from being sucked into a hellmouth) our actions can sometimes have dire consequences for people we have never met.  Our actions have impact on people who are not us.  Just like the way that words mean things, actions cause things.

The beauty that I find in the Whedonverse (which admittedly has it’s flaws) is that the story is not just a fluffy story.  The story has a place in an arc of events.  Every action has a ripple.  When Mal decided that the right thing to do is not to turn River and Simon over to the Alliance (a good thing), his good deed eventually caused the deaths of many people.  It didn’t make his deed any less meritorious for that situation but it completely affected the lives of other people in ways that Mal had not anticipated.  Buffy and Willow used magic to awaken every Potential Slayer to protect them all in the final fight and to save the world, but they also awakened Potentials like Dana, whom fate had decided was not to receive the powers.

Everything has to have balance.  Joss Whedon’s shows are full of characters who are faced w/ tough choices, choices that have consequences no matter what they decide.  Every action has a ripple.  And that is what this is all about.

*after watching the movie w/ the Guy I realize that what I was trying to think of was the Chaos Theory.  Both a butterfly effect and chaos theory would work…but I like the ripple.

This one is for Tobes.  Actually, it’s for all of us.

I am one of those totally dorky people who becomes so invested in a TV show character that she has spent years watching grow that she will cry at certain moments in that show.  This scene in the final episode of BtVS made me blub.  Completely and totally w/ snot pouring down my face blub.

To me it says a lot more than a bunch of girls getting supernatural powers.  It is a message that speaks beyond the pop culture and right to the heart of all women everywhere.

To you who think that Whedon isn’t a feminist, you have missed the fucking mark.  You have not been paying attention.  It’s called seeing past the pop culture and using your brain and seeing what the fuck he is trying to accomplish.  Joss Whedon gave us the first true female heroine on television in pop culture.  I know we had Wonder Woman, the bionic woman and such…but Buffy was the first girl who was like us.  Whedon gave us this girl, this person who looked like us and gave her the ability to not only not lay down and cry waiting to be rescued but to kick a little ass and do the rescuing herself.  Regardless of what SMG might say off camera, Buffy is a feminist icon.  She was just a girl, and a force to be reckoned w/.

Ever since his work on Roseanne, Whedon has been creating women who stepped outside of what was expected and perceived.  They were mouthy, they were sometimes crass and obnoxious.  They were sexual beings in charge of their own lives (once they figured out how to get there).  They were beautifully flawed and yet perfectly admirable.  

So, w/o further ado, I give you my favorite blubworthy Buffy moment.

Here’s to the Slayer in all of us.

(Cross Posted)

Joss Whedon is NOT a male white supremacist.  

If you think so you do not know what the poop you are talking about.  Try seeing past your misandry and using common sense b/f you spew bile all over the interwebs.

And certainly, b/f you think to try…do not bring it here.  Slander will not be tolerated.  Just ask the guy who tried to talk about the Dalai Lama here.

I just cleared two comments from my spam filter in Russian.  Now, I really have no way of knowing if it is in fact spam and not an actual comment, since I get several hits a day from Russia, but since I neither read nor have a translator for Russian, I have no choice.

What is some of the best spam you have filtered?  And does anyone else seem to notice their spam comes in cycles, IE, all viagara sites one day, porn the next, online poker the next…just curious.

As an off topic aside I think I am going to start a “you googled what to find me?” weekly post.  Some of them are just too great.

I know. That comes as a huge surprise to many of you out there (if i have any readers left after disappearing for so long). Some of you may recall a little news bit…something about some coffee place closing some stores.

What? You have heard? OK, good, we are on the same page there. Read more »

A great friend of mine had the *cutest baby yesterday! I was a little preoccupied holding the **most adorable freshly squeezed bundle of sweet screaming pooping life! I am on my way to do the same…so I will get around to blogs later!

Consider this an open thread for whatever suits your fancy!

And to the Mama, Yay! You did it!

*yes, i am biased.
**i reserve the right to say “my own children excepted” but like i said…biased.

Red Ear Sliders should not live together.

Bad Turtle!

Poor battered and bleeding turtle.

They have been separated…and I will have you know that someone is in a serious time out.

Any turtle knowledge is appreciated.
 

George Carlin, 71, died yesterday of heart failure.

What an incredibly great loss.

George Carlin was on my short list of people I would like to meet before I die, with Spalding Grey, the Dalai Lama and Alice Cooper. I have reasons for my desire to meet each one, and I have noticed the list of possibilities is growing shorter.

When I was younger and more naive I was appalled at the things that Carlin used to say in his shows. There was a time when I thought he was offensive. As I grew up in body and spirit and mind the things he would say in comedy began to poke at me and would actually make me think about the things I believed. To this day, I try to practice his wise words from one of my favorite stupid 80s movies of all time, “Be excellent to each other”.

His “Seven Words” act is one of the things he is most well known for among people who didn’t follow him that closely, and even got him a footnote in the legal history when the Supreme Court ruled that playing his act on a radio broadcast during hours when children could be listening was not OK.

I personally loved his pokes at religion. I have my reasons. I loved him in Dogma for a lot of the same reasons.

I will leave w/ this clip, that I have posted before, b/c aside from being amazingly hilarious, he also had a way w/ words that I found profound.

We will miss you, George. And I am sorry I never got the chance to finish my list.